Didnt have a lot of time or brain power today, but I did some Yoh Yashinari studies. I think these are from one of his sketchbooks?
Really liked how they turned out, but I just had a lot on my mind. Tomorrow mom's getting a dr's report on her body scan. Just one of those things i cant control. I hate it.
good studies though.
Trying to understand the basic shapes of the human figure.
First time in a long while I finished one of these.
I dont know how good of a job I did. But im just trying to learn what I can. Follow the fun. FOLLOW THE FUn.
Speaking of following the fun. I opened my resource folder and randomly picked something to draw. Found these monster girls and tried to redraw them.
Really really happy with how they turned out! These were Disgea characters. Im really happy. Trying to see the shapes. Trying to see the anatomy. Trying to have fun with it.
Good studies.
I tried doing this "Class" option on this new Line of Action website
It starts with fast gestures then slowly builds up into longer and longer.
I think the first few were 30 seconds then it slowly ramps up to 10 min.
I almost feel as though my time would be better spent doing anatomy studies during my "study" time. I kind of have an idea for a few things but I need to really have a nice refresher.
Next few were just free sketches.
First one was pretty basic. 2nd one. man i really like the 2nd one. I had a lot of fun with that one. I have a lot of different characters and species in my stories. I might explore this concept further in the future. Then the 3rd iw as trying to do some crazy foreshortening. I hate foreshortening. But I've never really done it so... might as well start somewhere.
So I went and did some perspective work.
Just some simple stuff.
I tried doing the same set of blocks in slightly different angles. not sure how well i pulled it off but hey.
Random anime face:
I hate how it still feels like I have so much more to learn. But ... I guess it will be ok. I had a lot of fun with todays character doodles. and even kind of enjoyed the perspective work I did. I'm still shaking off a bit of mental rust i think. But we'll see what happens.
good session.
Trying to shift my focus a bit to just have fun with the entire art thing again.
Not so much focused only on the "Study" part of it all, but rather just enjoying the process. Having fun with characters and stories and. I feel somewhere along the way I lost that. I was always really good about that, even in the study aspect, but something changed over the years.
A small mental shift. Instead of thinking about "tools" why not "toys"? It's an idea I have always had when thinking about game design stuff. Why not in all areas of art? Why cant everything be toys not tools?
Anyway, here's the pictures from the night.
Ran through pinterest and used that for inspiration for all these.
I've began uploading all the art I have created since 2018.
I spent the entire night combing through my own personal files to get them all posted here. After only managing to get up to 2019 uploaded I thought I would look at the raw files just to see what was going on there.
Turns out I have tons of unrendered studies and drawings that I just never saved out as pngs. This is both great and annoying at the same time. I think it will be fun to go back and render all these out to upload to the blog, but that only means it will take much much longer to fully get things up to date on here. So here's the plan:
My personal collection of drawings has ALWAYS been a mess. And even moreso after I started streaming. So I want to do this right. I want to properly organize all my personal collection of art files. This is actually a massive task that will take an incredible amount of time and I dont want this bog to "live in the past" while I work on getting all that updated. And i dont want to put all my personal projects on hold to update 3 years of posts on here. So I'm going to be working on the backlog of this blog as a side thing.
I'll be posting all old art on the correct date with as much information as I can remember from the time. Bad thing about posting art 3 years late is that you forget a lot of the context... 😆
As for modern work, I'll just pick up with my more recent stuff and we'll just go from there.
Everything uploaded with a " ~ " in the title is part of this. Past work that I might not have full context for everything uploaded but wanted to share it anyway.
So that's the plan for now.
Yoruichi Shihouin from the bleach!
Not super feeling how this one turned out. But hey. Not the worst thing in the planet right?
Samus!
I love Samus. She's the best. And im really happy with how this one turned out. Maybe a little flat in some areas. But not so flat in others. I love it. ♥
Did this nice little sketch.
It's actually really nice haha I love how it turned out. I got some reference from Pinterest, but never expected it to turn out so great. Foreshortening is super hard and is something i dont know nearly enough about. But it's something I need to learn if i want to get better.
Really happy with the forms and shapes.
Tristana from League of Legends!
Really happy with how this one turned out. Super cute as heck ♥
Following some more lessons from modern day james.
Then I tried drawing a random character. Kind of inspired by the lead artist of Wakfu....
mmm.. guess just not my day haha
but that's ok.
Maiden in black from Demon's Souls!
Super love this character.
Super love how this one turned out. What a great character.
Palutena from SMASH BROS!!!!
I really like how this one turned out!! It always really bugged me how my last Palutena looked and wanted to try drawing her again.
This was the one I did a few years ago
Click Here
Corrin from Fire Emblem!
Im really happy with how this one turned out! Really feel like my forms and shapes were pretty good.
Love undyne ♥
It's been a while since I'd drawn something for myself. Let's try to change that! Really like how she turned out ♥
need more hearts ♥♥♥♥3♥
woops that was a three.
threes arent hearts doggy lol
Amber from Genshin Impact
Super love the Genshin Impact style. It is a huge inspiration for how I would like my 3d games/3d artwork to look! This picture has a few things off, but Im really happy with how it turned out!
Depression is no joke but is unfortunately something I have grown all too familiar with.
After reading the last update I did to this blog, it's a bit unfortunate that I still dont have a whole lot of good news to toss onto the blog but I guess I might as well try and give some kind of an update.
Guess I should start with the artsy news first. Havent done a whole lot of drawing in 2020, but seeing how 2020 ended up being I cant say I'm that surprised. I did manage to get a couple of really nice pieces done, and managed to push past a couple of really deep mental blocks. (I'll try to get around to backposting those on the correct dates I created them) So I suppose it wasnt the worst thing ever.
I also made an attempt at programming and game design again. That would have been the 2nd or 3rd time I tried picking it up... though it unfortunately fell through again. At least until recently when i picked it up again. Turns out I have a surprisingly I'm in a really interesting place with my game design. Throughout my entire life I always thought game design/programming was something 100% out of my reach. And the more I spend time learning the code, learning the tools, and just generally engaging in that environment, it doesnt feel nearly as impossible as I thought it was. This has an interesting side effect of triggering a number of emotions, none of which are particularly desired... This definitely feels like the same feelings I felt when I started noticing my art skills slowly getting better. Like my brain was in disbelief that I was doing the thing I was doing and just kind of shut down. I was able to push my way past these feelings by sheer brute force and consistency, but man it was rough. And subsequently it's rough once again in the game dev field. I'll have a lot more to say about game design stuff on here. I'm determined to figure all this stuff out. Im determined. But man it's rough. These mental blocks are a nightmare.
Update on moms cancer
The best possible news I could start with is that Mom's cancer hasnt spread anymore. They found some junk in her bones that had spread from a previous breast cancer from many many years ago (early 2000s) then put her on some medicine and things have been pretty alright on that front. As long as she keeps taking her meds everything should be alright. We've been keeping a close eye on it and getting as many tests as we need and everything is pretty positive.
After having typed all that out I guess there was actually quite a bit of good that came from 2020. Lots of mental breakthroughs, some game design progress, moms cancer not spreading anymore.
But even with all that, it's hard to not feel like the worst thing ever. I just can help but feel like every every avenue I've explored has just kind of crumbled. Like life has just kind of dragged by along from one thing to another. I used to be so excited about things but lately it's just simply not the case. and hasnt been the case for longer than I'd like to admit. I know that if i put the time and energy into growing and progressing, the time and energy will speak for itself. And it absolutely has... But I'm just exhausted at this point. Recently I've taken active measures to properly acknowledging the depression I've struggled with for a long time. Not mentally beating around the bush, or hunting for "what else could be the problem" just facing things head on. And I've luckily been able to find some success in that regard. It doesnt make it totally bearable, but it's helped a little at least.
I think there's a good part of me that's just fallen out of routine. It's been a year since I've fallen out of the public eye. And I've never been gone from virtually everything for that long. It's given me a lot of time to think and meditate, but at the same time I think I need to rebuild some of those positive habits. and routines. I'm just gonna start small and see where I can push this. Entirely defeated and exhausted, Maybe I can make something work again. Last year was supposed to be my last epic year of pushing this content dream. But seeing that the entire year just kind of shit the bed for the entire planet, it would be dishonest to leave it off there. So I'll end this blog post with a requote from my last post.
"Here's the plan.
I'm giving myself one year to make something happen. I'm going to turn everything off and focus entirely on my goals. No more trying to figure things out. No more taking my time. Just do. Do the lessons, do the studies, learn the software, learn the techniques, learn the tools. My mental state is in shambles, the least I can do is what needs to be done.
Expect more frequent updates on all fronts."
and with that. Here is a random picture of Nona I drew late last year.
