BUT YA KNOW!
I had an interesting realization today. As you know I have been trying to finish up as many of my other projects as I can before I fully dive into this whole art thing and try to take it on more seriously and such. Although, unfortunately, a few personal and family issues have really come between me and achieving that goal and things just kind of melted into a scrambled mess during what little free and alone time I have. The realization still came regardless.
While my goals were noble and had good intention, I think there is something else going on behind the scenes that I'm glad i caught before it snowballed out of control (I doubt it would happen again, but let me explain) There is a psychological thing that was taking place here, one not too different from the one that distanced me from art for so many years. That is simply the act of distancing myself from my real goals. Putting other various things in front of the real goal that I want to achieve, getting better at art. And in the end, that is nothing more than an excuse to not continue my studies. Perhaps it's a sign of fear? A fear of failure? Or even a fear of success? While I doubt it is the latter of the two, maybe that is a real issue that I have yet to really consider. Fear of success? I have been stuck in a rut, art wise, for years. Kind of spinning my wheels in place only to not move anywhere. Understandably, I never really tried to get better during this rut and just kind of accepted things the way they were.
I had become comfortable with being the "useless never improving artist." And now that I'm actually challenging that way of thinking and actually seeing improvement, I'm unintentionally/ subconsciously retreating back to my old "comfort zone" of the "useless never improving artist" by throwing up these walls (random tasks) and setting distance between myself and further improvement.
I'm convinced these habits can not only be stomped, but completely overcome and conquered, but it's not going to do so unless I step forward and stop them in their tracks. I am cutting back on my previous projects to direct more attention to my art projects and studies. As for the personal and family issues, all should be sorted out next week so I should regain a good portion of my time. Till then... MORE SCRAMBLING!
--Character Development--
Time hasn't been on my side, but that doesn't mean I haven't been working on characters development! I've had a lot of time to really stop and think about my characters and how I want them to function around one another. I have had a lot of great ideas and have taken many of them into consideration. I am really liking what I am coming up with on the Doggy Doggy and Doggy series. I wish I could share more than what I have, but I really want it to be a surprise. WE'LL SEE THOUGH! I might throw out a few character designs on here, when I finally get them drawn out, but oh man. I'm excited.
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